THE GAME PLAN
Fighting Porn Addiction
Struggling with Pornography? Get the Game Plan!
Thank you for taking the time to check out this resource on helping people who are struggling with pornography. Our hope is that the video and information provided will help you further understand the struggle you or someone you know is having with pornography, God’s view on it, and some specific ways to overcome it.
We also understand that talking about it can be difficult. Know that we have well-trained people available that can help you take the next steps. To get started, watch the short video from Pastor Chris Brown.
PORNOGRAPHY - SIN OR ADDICTION?
We see God’s design for sex in the Garden of Eden in Genesis chapters 1 and 2. God made man and he made woman. He told them to “be fruitful and multiply” and they became “one flesh.” After a busy day, the Bible tells us “God saw all that he had made and it was very good.” God created all of us as sexual beings and sex is his gift to us. He designed sex to be used in marriage to literally bind you together with your spouse (hence the “one flesh” thing).
Over time, we’ve seen a dramatic change from God’s design for sex to what we’re seeing in society today. Pornography has pushed this over the top. What was once a shameful walk to the dingy part of a video store is now coming to you through computer or phone whether you want it or not. With pornography so easy to access and more and more people tuning in, our culture is becoming completely desensitized to it. What most don’t realize is just how addictive pornography is and the damage it has and will continue to cause in marriages and relationships.
God’s been pretty clear about his standards for our sexuality. Matthew 5:28 says “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Simply put, viewing pornography causes lust and lust is a sin. Any pornography intake is a sin. Included in this are internet sites, social media, magazines, books, social media and TV shows or movies that cause you to lust.
While some occasionally sin by watching pornography, for others viewing pornography has moved to the point where it’s no longer just a sin; it’s an addiction.
Whether you’re sinning or addicted, our aim is to help.
ARE YOU ADDICTED TO PORNOGRAPHY?
- Spending lots of time thinking about viewing pornography or ways to view pornography?
- Viewing pornography more often and spending longer amounts of time viewing it? You end up spending more time than you planned?
- Trying unsuccessfully to reduce, control or stop looking at pornography?
- Spending a lot of time looking for new sources or types of pornography?
- Watching pornography during work, school or at home when you should be doing other things?
- Spending less time going out, participating in hobbies or time with friends and family and spending more time viewing pornography?
- Continuing to view pornography despite the trouble it has caused in your relationship with your partner, family or with God?
- Spending more time viewing to achieve the same affect? AKA-Tolerance?
- Feeling restless or irritable if you can’t view pornography?
- Viewing pornography repeatedly over time?
If you answered yes to any one of the previous questions there is cause for concern, mainly because any sort of pornography intake keeps you from being the person God wants you to be and having the relationships he wants you to have. If you answered yes to at least five of the questions, you fit the criteria for pornography addiction and need help.
THE TRUTH ABOUT PORN
Pornography serves as a toxic “friend” when times get hard, stressful, and feel out of control. It gives a predictable short-term “feel good” without requiring any work on your part. It’s like collecting a paycheck after putting in zero work. Although that may sound good to some, it’s the exact opposite of a healthy and God-centered relationship focused on the importance of giving to your spouse. If you’re not in a relationship, pornography sets up a pattern of selfishness and self-gratification that almost always carries over into future relationships and marriage.
What can start as a way to kill time or feel good easily turns into a habit and if not dealt with, ends up in addiction. Once addicted, your ability to stop viewing pornography becomes exponentially harder.
Pornography almost always brings guilt, shame, and distance from anyone or anything that would hold us accountable.
In essence, pornography prevents you from being close to the very people that can help you in your struggle.
Stopping pornography use is not the end. Dealing with the problems underneath the pornography use is an equally important goal.
It’s important to be aware of the guilt, pain, loneliness, depression, stress or whatever the underlying issue is that creates the desire to use pornography. Getting to that empowers you to face the real issue without having to view pornography as a way to cope with what you’re feeling. We encourage you to meet with a counselor who can help you see the root causes of your pornography use.
WHAT TO DO NOW?
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! ”
2 Corinthians 5:17
Here are a few actions you can take right now if you want to cut pornography out of your life completely:
‘But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.’
2 Corinthians 12: 9-1O
Behold, I make all things new.
SUPPORT / RESOURCES
Here is a list of supports available to you at church as well as resources you can find online:
Support at North Coast Church
- Pastor: To meet with a pastor, call (760) 724-6700 ext. 239
- Counselor: To schedule an appointment with a counselor, call (760) 724-6700 ext. 239
- Sexual Addiction Group: Men Committed to Conquer to register call (760) 724-6700 ext. 187
“We Create Communities and Affordable Resources for Those Seeking Freedom from Unwanted Sexual Behavior and Shame”
- Covenant Eyes
Accountability Software (for internet blocking and reporting)
- Hope After Porn
Covenant Eyes eBook
- Book: Every Man’s Battle
Authors: Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker
Recommend: Read chapters 8-13.
- Book: Restored: A Woman’s Guide to Overcoming Pornography
Author: Alice Taylor
- Book: The Porn Circuit
Covenant Eyes eBook