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Extreme Makeover: Life Edition Message #3

Family Makeover (Part 1)

July 2-3, 2005 Pastor Chris Brown

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Food for Thought for the week of July 3, 2005
(Questions and Scriptures for further study)

Special note to those who aren’t parents or don’t have children in the home:  Though the questions below are focused mostly on parenting issues, many of the answers can also apply to other significant relationships in your life or if you hope to be a parent in the future.

1. This weekend we saw the importance of parents understanding their style of parenting.  A key piece in keeping a healthy balance of love and control is identifying and keeping in mind the unique God-given gifts and abilities they have been given.  What does Proverbs 3:27 & Proverbs 15:30 imply in communicating these qualities to your children?

Proverbs 3:27
Do not withhold good from those who deserve it,
when it is in your power to act.

Proverbs 15:30
A cheerful look brings joy to the heart,
and good news gives health to the bones. [NIV]

Take a moment and write down 2-3 abilities or positive character qualities of your children (if you have no children think of a couple of close friends).


How do you communicate what you wrote above to your children? Is it time to remind them how you specifically appreciate them?[NIV]

2. Why would Psalm 127:3-5 and Leviticus 26:39-43 be important for parents to remember?

Psalm 127:3-5
Sons are a heritage from the Lord,
children a reward from him.
[4] Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are sons born in one's youth.
[5] Blessed is the man
whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame
when they contend with their enemies in the gate.  [NIV]

Leviticus 26:39-43
Those of you who are left will waste away in the lands of their enemies because of their sins; also because of their fathers' sins they will waste away.
[40] " 'But if they will confess their sins and the sins of their fathers--their treachery against me and their hostility toward me, [41] which made me hostile toward them so that I sent them into the land of their enemies--then when their uncircumcised hearts are humbled and they pay for their sin, [42] I will remember my covenant with Jacob and my covenant with Isaac and my covenant with Abraham, and I will remember the land. [43] For the land will be deserted by them and will enjoy its sabbaths while it lies desolate without them. They will pay for their sins because they rejected my laws and abhorred my decrees. [NIV]

3. Teaching children to love and follow Jesus is a foundational role God gives parents (1 Timothy 5:8; Proverbs 22:6). To do this it is important to remember that most instruction is “caught, not taught” - in other words our life needs to back up what we say. How does John 13:34 reinforce this idea?

1 Timothy 5:8
If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. [NIV]

Proverbs 22:6
Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it. [NIV]

John 13:34
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. [NIV]

How does your daily life reflect what you hope your children will catch regarding what it means to know, love and follow Jesus in the following areas?

…serving and putting others first
… forgiving others and owning up to your mistakes
… loving your enemies
… speaking the truth in others
… time with God

4. John Eldredge wrote in his booklet, “You Have What it Takes,” that a son needs to know ‘he has what it takes’ and a daughter needs to know that ‘she’s worth pursuing.’ How does your relationship with your son or daughter communicate this on an ongoing basis (even if they are an adult)?